Secrets, Progress, and Latest Publication


“It doesn’t matter who you used to be. What matters is who you become.”

These are my notes for my latest post on Elephant Journal (Read it Here). I wasn’t aware that I was a “used to be” smoker until I wrote it and saw it. I immediately sent this photo to my boyfriend and said “I just realized that I don’t do this anymore.”

It felt really good

To think that a year ago I was choking myself, smoking a pack a day without even wanting to. Of course I thought I loved to smoke. But the more I thought about it and the more embarrassed I became around non-smokers when I would have to light up, I realized I hated myself for it.

It had to go.

I wish I could say that I haven’t touched one since last May, but that would be a lie. It has been a struggle. But instead of judging myself for that I look at that statement and think “Wow, I’m not a slave to them anymore.”

The thing that I was afraid to let go of was the thought that they defined me, even when I didn’t want them to anymore. Now they don’t and because of that I have evolved as a person.

I am a happier person and know that nothing defines me but myself.

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